On losing your keys (April 16th 2015)

There’s a trend with assignments. If you’re confident about it, you’re going to get a bad grade, and vice versa. No one knows why that is, but it holds us back. I’m hesitant with everything I write, second guessing every word like I’m stuttering. Right now I’m enjoying what I’m writing. It’s fun. But like I said, I worry that it’s only good in my head. It’s difficult writing under the weight of word counts and deadlines. You can’t rush creativity and you can’t sugar coat it with extra words. I’m trying my best to focus on this extract I have to write, even with other essays hanging over my head. I’d rather do really good in a class I like than in a class I hate. The grade would mean more to me. I like the class and the lecturer, so I want to try my best. If I feel like a lecturer has let me down, then why should I care? Why should I put my heart into it when they didn’t? You know you’ve failed your students when all they want is for the semester to be over. I don’t want to count my words, I want my words to count.

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