The last time I talked to my best friend was sometime in December of last year. That was the last time we really talked. Not just hey how are you I’m fine you. There’s no reason that I know of why that happened. There was no fight or argument, just three years being erased.
In my head, it’s been at least a month since I’ve stopped holding on. In reality, it could be just two weeks. Hope slows down time for the hurt, not giving us time to heal.
I don’t want an explanation, because some things can’t be explained. I want my ability to trust back. I don’t want silent alarms going off in my head, subconsciously pushing away people who might actually care. I want people to stay.