15 minutes of heartbreak

All I can remember are the things that you liked.  Do you still like them anymore?  Or were they just a phase, like I was?  I tried my best to familiarize myself with those things.  I tried to remember what to do and not do whenever you were upset.  But, you kept reminding me of people who were better suited then myself to cheer you up.  Still, I tried to work with what I had, what little you gave me.  These things occupy my mind, like shapes that were forced into the wrong hole.  They’re there, and they aren’t going away.  I contemplate telling you all the plans that I had which you spoiled.  Things that I wanted to do for you, but you never gave me the time to.  Not even a show of faith from your end, one that would have kept me from burning each and every scrap of paper.  There are things that are worse than breaking a promise, like not promising something in the first place because you don’t want to break it.  There are certain things that are implied, that don’t need promising, which still hurt when they’re overlooked.  I guess now you know that.  You always wondered what I wrote in that little black notebook of mine, and I told you that one day I’d show you.  I’ve changed my mind.  I regret the day I forgot to wear my watch.  I asked you for the time, as if your time was too precious for me to have.  I wonder what would have happened if I asked you to spare some change for the parking meter.

3 comments

  1. Makes me sad when reading this, but your use of words is amazing as always.

  2. I think this one gives a superb insight into how many are feeling, the battles of the heart. It should be read, at intervals, repeatedly.

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